Dear Father God,
AGAIN. Because when I checked on his FB page this afternoon and saw one of his photos, I remembered the face of the guy in my previous dream about the ring which i don’t want to accept because I don’t want to let go of the ring that Oliver gave to me. I’d been struck with a slice of realization that I was just denying to myself and that I already know from the moment I woke up that it was that Voldemort guy in that dream about the ring and it was his sad face that i saw.
Dear Lord, why does it have to be this way, to feel this way. I mean, I am more than okay now, or at least before that second dream occurred. I am even certain that I don’t want to do anything with him anymore. I don’t know if it was YOU or perhaps that side of me who always look for signs that I seem to always see his name everywhere I look, especially when I open the Bible. of all the names in the Bible, why do I have to see his name over and over again. Alright, given the fact that his name is really prominent in the Bible and in the story of this world, but…….I don’t know! Or perhaps, I’m just being too praning? Or another perhaps, it’s just an after-effect of watching Becoming Jane?
Lord, please, help me get out of this dilemma. I know this is part of your plan for me and this confusion is one of your ways for me to test my patience and my willpower against temptation. I just pray Lord that you make me stronger and may You bless me with a discerning mind and heart so I could distinguish Your voice from that of the devil’s or from the voice coming from my heart’s desires. I only give my trust to You for I know that you will take care of my heart.
Note: repost (july 2010)