“You are not forgotten…”

Take me back to the day when I first met You.”

A good friend once articulated this statement during the time she was having personal struggles and felt so much in need of the Father’s comfort. Though I wasn’t having any serious spiritual or emotional battle that time, that statement already overwhelmed me and made an impact to my wondering mind and intrigued heart. It was like something’s telling me that one day, I’m going to use that statement as I go through this journey with God.

Perhaps that one day is now. Well, not literally now as in today, but it’s actually the season I am in at the very moment. To be honest, I’m not quite sure what season God has placed me right now. I am still in the state of confusion.

Would God want me to do this or that? Would He want me to get involve or just be eagle-eyed on what’s happening?

I haven’t been hearing from Him of late. No, I don’t blame Him or feel ill towards Him for being silent. In fact, I’m not even sure if God’s really silent or I’m just being too preoccupied with the things of this world that I can’t seem to hear His small voice.

Perhaps, it’s the latter….

I’m pinning it on myself why the once aflamed me suddenly became impassive.

God’s been wanting to put that fire back and fortify our relationship but I’m the one always looking at other things to make and do instead of just following Him. I am no longer focusing on Him and setting my sight straight to Him, and worst, I am even allowing the enemy to distract me by acknowledging his lies.

I have become tired of this world. I am slowly becoming exhausted of this walk. Even my writings’ becoming a crap.

I have been feeling on a rush about most of the things in my life these days. Maybe it’s the I-am-hitting-30-in-a-few-years syndrome that’s making me feel like I need to accomplish this and that before I hit that age. I am putting pressures on myself. It’s as if I’m in major panic over what I should do with my life.

The result of that panic and pressure: failing to enjoy the journey.

I was reminded of God’s perfect timing again in the Bible verse shared in the church this afternoon:

Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8

A Time for Everything

 1 There is a time for everything, 
   and a season for every activity under the heavens:

 2 a time to be born and a time to die, 
   a time to plant and a time to uproot, 
 3 a time to kill and a time to heal, 
   a time to tear down and a time to build, 
 4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, 
   a time to mourn and a time to dance, 
 5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, 
   a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, 
 6 a time to search and a time to give up, 
   a time to keep and a time to throw away, 
 7 a time to tear and a time to mend, 
   a time to be silent and a time to speak, 
 8 a time to love and a time to hate, 
   a time for war and a time for peace.

I know God wouldn’t want me to continue moving in this kind of rotten thoughts and emotions. No. No. No. God said I am too precious for Him to let the enemy captivate my thoughts and emotions and overpower His sovereignty in my life. I am sure that God wants me to just stay calm and be secured in the truth that He has a greater purpose for me than what I have for myself. I can only see up to this point in my life but God is looking way way farther, even beyond my imaginations.

I don’t have a clear vision of what’s in store for me and I’m not quite sure what’s the purpose of this season of my life. I am not even sure when this period will pass. I am just certain that God is in the works and He knows what’s perfect for me. Whatever His plans are, be it involving spiritual and emotional battles like what I’m going through right now, one thing holds true to the very end: GOD’S LOVE NEVER FAILS. His plans for us are always to our best because they are propelled with unconditional love that only God can shower us.

As I was writing this post, this particular song keeps playing in my head, and because of that, I’m making it the official soundtrack of my current season:-)

You Are Not Forgetten – Israel Houghton

People walking by, very seldom they say “hi”
they don’t know how wonderful you are
If they only knew all the things you’ve been through,
if only they could see your heart
I hear you crying for help, please don’t blame yourself..
You are not forgotten, you are not forgotten

When it’s time to go to sleep and you try your best to keep..yourself from falling apart.
There’s no need to fear, because I’m already here, and I’m the one who sees your heart..
I hear you crying for help, please don’t blame yourself..
You are not forgotten, you are not forgotten

You are not just a face in the crowd, you are not a forgotten child
Let Me whisper it loud, I love you, oh, I love you

You can hold your head up high, ’cause I’ll make everything alright, I’m committed to you smiling again
And eventually you’ll see people’s similarities, everyone just needs a friend..
And when they’re crying for help, you’ll be able to tell them, please tell them for Me
You are not forgotten, you are not forgotten
You are not forgotten, you are not forgotten