Dear you: I’m the one that got away.


I did like you, but she loves you. And for that, she deserves you more.

I met you at such a time when I least expect that feeling to knock in my heart again. Yes, that’s cliche. And yes, that’s true. I traveled miles away from home not to feel that feeling again, but to find another piece of home in a foreign land and to pursue my passion  and calling. And then you happened.

Life has a series of firsts. And in some of the many firsts in my life, you were there. You were in that scene when I first experienced the felicity of singing a particular song just because it was about us. I’ve kept a good number of memories with you. How you made me feel on a high without you realizing it just because I’m very good at pretending they were just usual stuff for me. But believe me, they all made a mark in me.  I’d say those were lovely to keep in my memory box.

No, we were never together. There wasn’t any label at all. I’d say we were like those ‘almost’ stuff we usually see in movies.We just didn’t end the way they ended in movies. It was a sudden end. You know, those types where the other one will still keep on thinking why everything ended.

And it was me who WAS left wondering. While you went on creating new chapters in your life, I was left thinking why the sweet days had to end.

For a while I thought the pain will take a long time to heal. Surprisingly, it didn’t. Yes, I still think of you. I still remember you whenever I hear those songs or pass by those particular places. I did spend a couple of months trying to move on from where we left off. But seeing you again after almost a year, I just know that that was the closure that I needed. That’s what I needed to finally end this delusion that we still have it.

I like you. But that won’t be enough to make me compromise my standards and my beliefs. You were almost perfect for me. I almost darkened all my checked boxes when I met you. But that one thing that is very important to me and that would help me determine if you are ‘the one,’ that’s the only box that was left un-checked. And I wouldn’t dare give that one up for the thrill of having someone.

We don’t share the same love for Jesus.

You may say I’m too righteous and I’ve set my bar too high. Yes, I do. I’ve waited long enough for God’s best for me and I wouldn’t want to play along the curves just for that ‘in a relationship’ status.

We’ve lost that bond. But I’m happy to keep my principle. As you’ve told me before, you admire me for being able to keep my standards and keeping firm about it. And I will still keep that until that rightful person comes along.

If there’s one thing I feel sad about losing us, it’s the friendship. We weren’t able to save it. I knew we tried but it just can’t be the same again.

I’ve been seeing your photos with the girl. You seemed happy. And being happy for you was the decision I’ve made that night we met again and you talked to me about her. Yes, I did like you, but she loves you. And for that, she deserves you more.

I’d like to believe our episode already ended. You are happy creating new memories with her and I’m happy and contented waiting for God’s rightful one for me. I don’t know until when the waiting will be, but I trust God’s process and timing. As for you, I wish you well. I do hope you will not forget me wherever you will go. Well at least, I hope you will keep me in your memory box as well as I’ll be keeping you in mine. You made me happy for that particular episode of my life and you deserve that spot.

Until we meet again. Maybe in one of the streets of this city. Or maybe somewhere in this world.


Dear Ely and Bamboo: You never fail to rock my world!

Dear Ely and Bamboo: You never fail to rock my world!

In the 90s, all I’ve ever dreamed of was to see these two men sing together on stage. I was just around 10 or 11 then but I was already a die-hard fan of these OPM rock icons. Their music definitely defined my life’s 90’s episodes. More than a decade after, their music are still rocking my playlist. Yes, I was a fan then and I am still a fan until now. And gladly, one of my dreams did come true. They didn’t only sing on stage together, they even made pizza together:-)

Dreams do come true:-)



Someday My Prince Will Come…

And definitely, that someday already came true for Kate Middleton.

Just a few hours ago, she bade goodbye to her ‘commoner’ status and welcomed her new life as part of the Royal Family when she tied the knot with Prince William.

And I must admit, I’m part of that thousands–or perhaps–millions of ladies in the whole world who once wished to marry Prince William (or cge na nga kahit fling lang!) I first saw him during the time of Princess Diana’s death and I instantly developed a huge crush on him. I even dreamed of working in the Buckingham Palace after college and I would bump into Prince William in the hallway and he would fall in love with me because he would find me different from all the other girls who were swooning over him.

And yes, I even had a background song for that fresh-from-Jane-Austen-book-moment: Suddenly by Soraya.

A thousand eyes looking at me
But yours is the look that goes right through me
And I cannot hide from your stare
Should I let you in do I dare
Some other hands have tried before
But yours is the touch that makes me want more
And I cannot hide the urgency
To have you lying here with me because

Suddenly in my life
There’s something that’s got me mystified
And I cannot fight it but I can try
To keep the wonder of it alive

See, that was a perfect song for us–if only Prince William had the chance to see me!

Okay. Cut the crap!

But I must admit, this song still perfectly suits Wills and Kate’s love story. Sige na nga, papaubaya ko na sa kanila! After all, I must admit that they look so beautiful together:-)

I still like Prince William –balding hair or not. He is still the only prince–by the world’s definition of it–who ever captured my heart:-) And I liked him even more for choosing Kate Middleton. He just proved that love knows no social status and background. He didn’t conform with the tradition and what his status dictates. Instead, he followed his heart and chose to love a commoner, a simple lady out of an array of pretty women with a royal blood.

Prince William and Kate’s story brought to life the lovely fairy tales of a prince falling in love with a lady he just saw on the road on the way to the palace (or any sort of Cinderella stuff you can think of) which we thought could only happen on fairy tale books. Or Jane Austen’s books since I’m no big fan of the league of princesses headed by Cinderella, Snow White, and Sleeping Beauty.

As I watched the Royal Wedding today, I didn’t only feel ‘kilig,’ but gladness that I was part of a generation who was able to witness a fairy tale came true to life. And as I watched the royal couples exchanged vows, I could feel and see the love they seem to have for each other. The way he looked at her while saying his vows made me want to melt in so much ‘kiligness.’ These two souls with ‘special blood types’ made me believe that true love could really happen even to those people surrounded with fame, power, and fortune

Very far, indeed, from that of Prince Charles and Princess Diana’s wedding in 1981. I watched the video of that 1981 royal wedding just to compare and perhaps try to parse if Prince William really love Kate and vice versa or they’re just pretending. And the verdict? I think Big Willie really loves Babykins:-)

Today, I kissed my super far-fetched dream of becoming Her Royal Highness Princess William of Wales goodbye (not that I ever think that would be possible!) but nonetheless, I welcomed in my heart the truth that someday, my prince will come my way, too. His blood may just be as normal as mine, but I know for sure that he will make me feel as royal as any princess of God should. He may not be part of a royal family but he is God’s prince and I know that God would make him perfect for me. My prince that’s yet to come is not driven by money or by power or anything that this world dictates, but he is driven by the fullness of his love for Christ.

Until such time that God says so,  my prince and I will patiently wait for that time when our paths will finally cross. We will never waver in faith and we will never let society pressure us. We will definitely wait for God’s perfect time, for only then can a true love can experience a happy ever after.

To Kate Middleton, someday my will prince will come, too. (Kala mo ikaw lang? Echusera!)